For parents
My son did not have a brit as a baby
Families come to me with boys of every age: two, six, ten, fifteen. It is never too late, and it does not have to be frightening, for him or for you.
You are not the only family
Some families arrived from the former Soviet Union, where a brit was not possible. Some lived far from any Jewish community. Some simply did not know how important it was, or the baby was circumcised in the hospital without a brit.
Whatever the reason, there is no blame here. What matters is the step you are taking now.
Planned around your son
A boy of six needs something very different from a boy of fourteen. How it is explained to him, what he is told beforehand, how his privacy is protected, and how the pain is managed are all planned around his age, together with you, in advance.
If your son was already circumcised in a hospital, it may be only a brief hatafas dam brit.
For teenagers especially
A teenager often cares most about privacy and about being treated with respect. I speak with him directly, answer his questions honestly, and nobody outside the family needs to know.
It is also a beautiful time for him to receive a Hebrew name, if he does not have one yet. See also hatafas dam, teens and revisions.
Short answers
Is my son too old for a brit?
No. A brit can be done at any age. Everything is planned around his age.
How is pain managed for a child?
Pain management is planned in advance for his age, and I go through it with you before anything is scheduled.
My son was circumcised in the hospital. What does he need?
Often only a brief hatafas dam brit. A rabbi decides each case; tell me what happened and I will tell you what applies.
One private conversation.
It costs nothing, commits you to nothing, and stays between us.